ALPLAUS UNITED METHODIST CHURCH
  • Home
  • About
  • Pastoral Message
  • Video Message
  • Calendar
  • Muse
  • Activities
Picture

Mother's Day

5/4/2022

0 Comments

 
   When we celebrate Mother’s Day on the second Sunday in May, it’s thanks to U.S. president Woodrow Wilson, who signed a measure in 1914 officially establishing the holiday. Since then, Mother’s Day gifts have been the focus of most Mother’s Day ideas, though Mother’s Day cards—and the Mother’s Day wishes written inside—remain top of mind too.  But as great as gifts for mom are, nothing beats spending time together. Maybe that looks like Mother’s Day brunch or Mother’s Day movies on repeat from morning till night.  No matter how you choose to honor the special moms, grandmas, and like-a-mom ladies in your life, know that it’s sure to be deeply appreciated.
 
Mother’s Day jokes:
  • “After a long day, my favorite thing is to think of something for dinner that everyone will eat.” --No mother, ever
  • I’d love to be a Pinterest mom, but it turns out I’m more of an Amazon Prime mom.
  • Showering as a mom should be an Olympic sport: Everyone’s yelling your name, you have to beat the clock, and you rarely win a medal.
  • I hate when I’m waiting for Mom to cook dinner—and then I remember I am Mom.
  • I live in constant fear of having to share a “fun fact” about me.
  • I would like to officially apologize to my toddler for opening her granola bar from the top instead of the bottom. I don’t know what I was thinking.
  • Mom’s casseroles come in two sizes: not enough and enough to feed an army with leftovers.
  • Have you heard the urban legend about what happens when you scream “Mom” three times in the shower? A nice lady appears with the towel you forgot.
  • I love all my children equally. Except for the one who sleeps. I love that one more.
  • Mom’s recipe for iced coffee: Have kids. Make coffee. Forget you made coffee. Put it in the microwave. Forget you put it in the microwave. Drink it cold.
  • I love my kids. Not enough to flip the chicken nuggets halfway through cooking, but I love them.
  • Mom sleep: the state of rest where your eyes are closed but you can still hear everything your kids are doing.
(Shared in part from Readers Digest)
Spring Blessings, and Happy Mother’s Day!
Lisa Beretz, 518-330-9277
 

0 Comments

The Cross Was His Own

4/4/2022

0 Comments

 
They borrowed a bed to lay his head
When Christ the Lord came down;
They borrowed the ass in the mountain pass
For him to ride to town;
But the crown that he wore
And the cross that he bore
Were his own.

He borrowed the bread when the crowd He fed
On the grassy mountainside;
He borrowed the dish of broken fish
With which he was satisfied;
But the crown that he wore
And the cross that he bore
Were his own.

He borrowed the ship in which to sit
To teach the multitude;
He borrowed a nest in which to rest;
He had never a home so rude;
But the crown that he wore
And the cross that he bore
Were his own.

He borrowed a room on his way to the tomb
The Passover Lamb to eat;

They borrowed a cave for him a grave;
They borrowed a winding sheet;.
But the crown that he wore
And the cross that he bore
Were his own.

The thorns on His head were worn in my stead
For me the Savior died.
For guilt of sin the nails drove in
When Him they crucified;
Though the crown He word
And the cross He bore
Were His own
They rightly were mine. (Poet: unknown)

Easter Blessings,
Lisa Beretz,
LLBeretz@gmail.com
0 Comments
<<Previous

    Archives

    May 2022
    April 2022
    March 2022
    February 2022
    January 2022
    November 2021
    October 2021
    September 2021
    July 2021
    June 2021
    May 2021
    April 2021
    March 2021
    February 2021
    January 2021
    December 2020
    November 2020
    October 2020
    September 2020
    August 2020
    July 2020
    June 2020
    May 2020
    April 2020
    March 2020
    February 2020
    January 2020
    December 2019
    November 2019
    October 2019
    September 2019
    August 2019
    July 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    October 2018
    September 2018
    August 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    March 2018
    February 2018

  • Home
  • About
  • Pastoral Message
  • Video Message
  • Calendar
  • Muse
  • Activities